Seven years after my sister’s sudden death, I've created a tool to visualize my grief journey—and discovered unexpected signs of resilience and growth.
Christine I’m just now reading through all of your Substack including this entry and am overwhelmed by your vulnerability and authenticity in your sharing as well as your determination to make sense of your grief. I share all of this with you as the mother who lost her 18 year old son suddenly to suicide 2.5 years ago. I think I’m ready to start sharing my own process more publicly and appreciate the inspiration you’ve provided. It’s also liberating as a fellow perfectionist to see you be completely candid that you write to make sense of your grief. I could feel my whole body relaxing as I read that. Grief and trauma are perhaps two of the most complex experiences we will ever go through. Thank you for modeling the catharsis and healing that writing provides.
Thank you for your kind words, Laurel. I'm so grateful to know that some of what I put out there is helpful to someone. I often wonder. I also frequently hear that my openness is "too much" for some people. And so, when I receive such a heartfelt, generous comment like yours, I'm reminded that it's okay to put my heart out there. I literally don't know how to do life any other way. You didn't have to take the time to write what you did, so I thank you for that. Above all else, I'm so very sorry for your loss, and I'm in awe of what I'm only just now learning about your own healing journey. Here's to embracing the vulnerability. I love that we can help people with our honesty. xo
This is powerful and fascinating. What a unique idea to map out the process of grief over time. Of course, we're all familiar with the old theory surrounding the grieving journey, which, in my opinion, is an OK starting point but rather limited.
I particularly like how many different aspects of the grieving journey that you were able to distinguish. There are some that I was completely surprised to experience, for example, flashbacks and dissociation. Reading this made me realise just how far I've come!
Christine I’m just now reading through all of your Substack including this entry and am overwhelmed by your vulnerability and authenticity in your sharing as well as your determination to make sense of your grief. I share all of this with you as the mother who lost her 18 year old son suddenly to suicide 2.5 years ago. I think I’m ready to start sharing my own process more publicly and appreciate the inspiration you’ve provided. It’s also liberating as a fellow perfectionist to see you be completely candid that you write to make sense of your grief. I could feel my whole body relaxing as I read that. Grief and trauma are perhaps two of the most complex experiences we will ever go through. Thank you for modeling the catharsis and healing that writing provides.
Thank you for your kind words, Laurel. I'm so grateful to know that some of what I put out there is helpful to someone. I often wonder. I also frequently hear that my openness is "too much" for some people. And so, when I receive such a heartfelt, generous comment like yours, I'm reminded that it's okay to put my heart out there. I literally don't know how to do life any other way. You didn't have to take the time to write what you did, so I thank you for that. Above all else, I'm so very sorry for your loss, and I'm in awe of what I'm only just now learning about your own healing journey. Here's to embracing the vulnerability. I love that we can help people with our honesty. xo
This is powerful and fascinating. What a unique idea to map out the process of grief over time. Of course, we're all familiar with the old theory surrounding the grieving journey, which, in my opinion, is an OK starting point but rather limited.
I particularly like how many different aspects of the grieving journey that you were able to distinguish. There are some that I was completely surprised to experience, for example, flashbacks and dissociation. Reading this made me realise just how far I've come!